I want to say I had a great night but I was so shy and nervous that it was most def noticeable. :(
Did we eventually kiss, yes indeed and wow-
Update :
I heard from you and it was brief hey how are you blahs and come to find out I was your drunk text - I've never been your drunk text or bc and now I can say I've Been both. Not sure that I Like it.
So I start talking to this other guy I feel an instant connection like wow this is good so for a week texting phone calls thinking this one has potential yay me I can move past hb .... So yesterday what happens hb texts me and I light up it's the same hey how are you blahs WTF so I stop texting potential like an idiot.
Days go by nothing again
Then you come around with you're silly jokes and make me smile I buy your work excuse and leave it at that. I know better if he wanted to hear from me see me he'd make the move I get it. So I canx the date I Saturday because of him for mr unavailable maybe I'm protecting this heart of mine or maybe I'm scared. Talked to an old friend today and what he said makes sense I was way to shy I said just a little he was like no way the shyest I've ever met and the biggest prude. Which is totally right because I am! Men sex sext ing dirty pics I get embarrassed and do t know how to deal with any of it. So I shy away from guys because unless I can hide that I feel they won't accept that innocence I still have - like I'm. A little girl lost I guess.
So I posted that I want my heart back
It sucks because sometimes you can't help the way you feel. I'm not using the l word because that's not what this is. I'm using the you captured a piece of my heart. I care for you and I never ment to. It was so easy to fall into the comfort with you we picked up like we've never missed a beat. No awkward silence or anything so have you taken a piece of me yes a piece you always had - it's not healthy not for me because you are the one that breaks down Every wall guard moat dragon that stands watch on this heart of mine. It all fades you make me smile uncontrollably Everytime I'm around you you kiss me and the world around me fades. I have always felt this connection with you and you are so hard to read. We laugh and joke and it'd the easiest thing to just be me when you're around and you go days weeks without calling or texting I have to be the one to contact you and this role reversal is unheard of in my world. I just want more from you and I've said in the past and I've done it before I'm walking away. I've cried more than once over you and I want the tiny piece you took back so I can give t to someone who I will feel even greater for and they will in return. I nicked named you heart breaker a year ago and the name seems to fit.
I have gone back and forth on this whole do I date or don't I date... that is the question. So when I decided whether its because of friends pushing me or myself thinking why not jump in and try again.
So I do have an online dating profile that I activate/deactivate when I feel the need to. Anyway, so I decided to go on a date after talking to this guy online off and on and thru text. After friends saying what do I have to lose and give him a chance. I go on this date am I nervous oh heck yea I am, because why that's just how I get. I get anxiety. nervous, shy, etc you name it. So I drive the 45 mins since he wasn't going to meet me half way. By the way that should have been my first clue. Trying to do this justice thru a blog is going to be difficult. I arrive at the restaurant that we agreed on and he was over 30mins, late! When I walked up to the restaurant he wasn't even close to what he described. I smiled and stayed pleasant we went inside and I figured I wasn't going to be rude and give him a chance.
Men a Tip: T -shirt and shorts are ok with the exception a faded old plain what t shirt and some some old shorts. Look I don't judge people on what they wear does it have to be expensive no way, anyone can make clothes from walmart or target look good. But old dingy clothes that were probably laying in a pile on your floor- not cool.
Second Tip: Load up on the Axe body spray to the point where I'm gaging not cool, my 8yr old son wears better! Axe should never be worn A) by a grown man B) or by anyone!!
ok So back to this whole date thing- we are at the restaurant and we sit down... then he bails to the bathroom or like 15m ins. I swear he ditched me and I'm secretly wishing he did. As he returns he is sweating like he just ran a marathon and I'm kinda concerned like what the hell. We look over the menu and he says he's not eating anything he hates Mexican food. I just kinda stare at him because we discussed this prior to going there. I said ok well I'm still going to order something if that's ok.
Gosh I think its best if I just sum all of this up- basically he was Spanish at a Spanish restaurant the waiter tried talking to him in Spanish and he just stared at him and was like what huh say that again I don't understand. I understood more of what the waiter said then he did. So after i order he decided I guess he wanted something so he orders off the children's menu! He orders chicken fingers, like what the ..... Our food comes out and this dude throws a fit because they don't have honey mustard?!?? Honey mustard really?!??! I quietly eat my food and then ask for a to go box cause I'm ready to get the f outta there. He pays which kinda throws me off and I light up a cig and tell him thanks and he asks if I wanna get outta there and go back to his place! Really where did I give you the I'm into you vibe? Wow he's hurt that I am not interested in him. I thank him for dinner and leave.
My saving grace- my best friend in the whole world lives 5 mins from there and had a drink waiting for me!
My mothers wisdom the other day was that these years are going to be the toughest that I'm ever going to face but I can make it thru them it's going to get easier / I sure hope so! Tonight's conversation with Dylan showed me I can still feel and my heart does exist somewhere inside -My boys spent the weekend with their father and like most when they come home Dylan is upset. While sitting down watching Food Challenge and pumpkin carving he asked me where I met his dad and I told him and his question was why I picked such a mean daddy. I tried to answer the best i could and then he asked for a new one and if could find and meet one for him and I said I'd try my best to find a new a one but it's not that easy. My only answer that i could come up with is for him to ask God. So side note as I am retelling this umm this is a news flash I have tear ducts holy crap anyone that knows me knows it takes mountains moving and seas to part for me to cry and well I shed a tear.... Wow ok
This is my question and Totally Random I promise. But I was thinking about it today for someone reason....
If you become the other women would you tell the wife or girlfriend that you were in fact the other party?
Or if the guy lied and said there was no girlfriend and you find out there is in fact a girlfriend do you tell her?
You are the wife or girl friend would you want to know if you were cheated on or is ignorance bliss?
My take is ignorance is not bliss and everything eventually sees the light of day. But do you be honest because they say honesty is the best policy.
So I've realized in life when ceilings cave in or in this case cars break down over and over no day care money problems my friends are awesome. Like when my wallet was left at walmart and I wet back for it they had it. I called ppl when my car broke down an they had answers even Randomness. I guess what I'm trying to say is my faith in humanity has been restored once again. And I am forever grateful. God has been really good to me even as a stray I know he still loves me and cares for our well being. Makes me want to sing some Tobymac 'In the light' ' I am forever grateful for my friends and the people in my life. You guys are awesome and I dont think I say thank you enough or show you enough how awesome you are. Thank you again.
This addition to The Weekender has been brought 2 you by Red Bull, Grey Goose, Ciroc Luxury Vodka, camel, Ross, and Ulta
Friday dinner with the girls and shopping for shoes.
Saturday shopping car almost blew up but fixed now then saw the boy gave him his bday gift <3 Randomness and drinks.
Saturday Night out with Joanna went to kokoamos had a blast dancing and remember being told that were were like the most amazing and Fun. Cab driver was crazy for the amount consumed no hangover gotta love grey goose and redbull.
Sunday- some random guy don't get random and randomness confused sat next to me at church half thru the service and just started talking to me during service and asking me biblical question so I turned to him after like the 12th question and was like dude I don't freakin know. So then he got up and walked out. like he invaded my space to ask me questions wayyyyyy to close to me dude.
<3
Its like having buyers remorse but wayyy worse So I deleted every txt pic his number and mentally washed my hands of him, but you know I regret it why oh cruel world why because he is like a drug I don't want to give up. I wish I didn't delete it all or at least his newest pic. look when u read this don't get it twisted there's no puppy love just an addiction two very different things. And if you've known me a majority of my life there have been a few that fit his category Chinga, A.B., B. H., and now Randomness. There is like this gravitational pull like I so get John Mayers comment about Jessica Simpson or was it Jennifer Aniston whichever it makes sense to me!
So it started a few weeks back- I forgot I gave my number out to this guy.
I am out with the girls and get a random text from this guy "what are you doing'
ME: 'I'm out with my girls'
Guy: "Where at maybe I'll come there'
So anyway we go back and forth with texts by the end of the night he gets mad that I won't come see him.
Remember Random Text- For real like let me jump on that offer to go to some dude's house. I maybe somewhat daring but not crazy!
So I text him like a few days later and asked if he was still mad... he said nope we're cool. Days go by, nothing then I get a "hey" and I send a "hey" you know the drill. He sends me pics of him, nothing your grandmother would faint over just regular pics just so you know I am not that kind of girl. This goes on for about a month the "hey" every few days, then yesterday he was like hey do you want to meet and put a face to the texts and I was like OK but I have to get my kids so it's gonna be like for 5 mins he said OK. I was like whhhhhat, for real, OK but I can give you He said cool so I met random texter guy. Yea so added him to my phone as random texter guy Haha I still don't know his name Only me!! Why didn't I ask you maybe be thinking.... Too busy drooling Ha Like total stumbling over words Hotttttttttttt How old is he I have no idea hello don't even know his name. But I met a hot guy on the way home from work how many times does that happen to me NEVER
And hugged me and said it was nice meeting me and I said same here I don't know how too proceed this is weird then he texted me after I left and was like I like thick girls and I said thanks cus I had no idea what else to say and that was it I have no idea what will happen next did I mention he was like wayyyyyy Hott sooooo out of my league.
Girl meets guy Guy
Girl and Guy have a date
Girl decides Guy was ok but not girls type
Date ends girl doesn't hear from guy no big deal girl wasn't that into guy to begin with.
Guy txts girl 3-4 days later 'Please don't be mad girl you're not really my type can we be friends', Girl says "Sure why not and I wouldn't be mad about that, thanks or letting a girl know where she stands'.
Guy says "Cool I thought Girl would take it bad and didn't want to be disrespectful
Girl says nope it's cool.
Days go by Guy doesn't txt Girl.
Girl doesn't txt guy Guy starts txting girl a few days later nonstop.
Girl responds to guy since guy and girl decided to be friends.
Guy's txt become somewhat personal. Girl is scratching head wondering how to respond.
Guy asks if Girl wants to get together again.
Girl thought Guy said I wasn't his type so why the wanting to hang out?
This Dating Stuff is confusing!
What I have learned so far: Don't wear heels on a first date you never know when you will have to literally run!
No joke, I had to run across a parking lot wearing cute Nine West Heels so not cool!
~ Always remember where you park so again when you have to "duck out" and RUN you go out the proper exit. Refer to Rule 1 - Don't Wear Heels!
I have decided to not go backwards with this I have had some funny dates and not so fun ones.
I hope you are able to see the humor in my dating experience.
My Blog has taken a detour so to speak.
I have used my friends to tell the tales of my dating experiences and the "self-help" books I've read to navigate these uncharted waters. Some of my experiences so far have been funny, heart breaking, and left me scratching my head. So I've decided to share my tales with the world.
Feel like writing -
like how many wishes can you wish on a star - is it like a tootsie pop and how many licks to the center because I have a whole list! I mean like a really really really long one. So last night I just started rambling it off in no particular order on the first star I saw.
And this whole kissing frogs how many frogs do you kiss until it turns into a prince? Disclaimer just a general question not wanting a prince I am content with my life the way it is, seriously. please I know he'll come when the time is right blah blah blah. Just a general statement .
I want to be like the song billionair like for real people put me next to oprah and the Queen! Or least on her show when she gives crap away!
Scales not the ones on fish do you go with the one you use everyday with no progress or the random one you jump on with a ten pound differnce in your favor i say the one in your favor right? Cause that was pretty sweet !
Speaking of sweet tomorrow I say guads at town center anyone in? Boys with Scott this weekend and no dates lined up.
On this day in 2002, I said " I Do" to a man who gave me the greatest gifts anyone can give another, two amazing boys who are my heart and soul.
As rocky as the road was while we were together I look back and with no regrets I love my kids.
Since May of 2008 it has been a nightmare or as I like to call it a real life Jerry Springer Show- I am about to head to meet the lawyers and wishing this all goes well and the end of my days as Robin Davis and I will be FREE of his lying, cheating, no good, sorry a$$.
Twice in the past few days I have come across the question who would play you in the movie of your life?
It was first part of the 5QF and from a daily devotional that was amazing and basically said the same thing but on a Biblical level. I will try to post it. So, if you know how I think that well nothing is by accident in this world. So I just want to say that I am a firm believer in you get back what you put out into this world of ours. What do I mean by that... if you put out positive vibes you get positive things in your life. I can't stand when people are negative and have a bad attitude and then wonder why things are going wrong for them. Do I mean that 'hey if I am nice , I should win a million dollars', nope not at all. Am I always bubbly and a ray of sunshine, not even close on my best day but I can't stand negative attitudes or the mind set that if things don't go the way I have planned, let's whine, complain, moan, throw a fit, until we get our way! Yes that's it that's the way to get thru life!
Ok enough on that I just saw enough of that today at work.... makes me sick...
So my randomness today- I am lovin' BOBFM at work, listening to my playlist when not listening to BOBFM, I love the last hour of work when everyone is gone since I come in an hour after everyone. I seem to get more done....oh wait this doesn't count as work ;) .
I surprised Dylan and took him to see Toby Mac and Skillet at Chrysler Hall in Downtown Norfolk. We had a blast it was his 1st concert and he loved it! If you don't know who either of them are you must check them out!! It is kid and parent approved!
http://www.tobymac.com/
http://www.skillet.com/enter.php
My Table minus the Baskets: $69.99 looks brand new I will post a pic of it soon!
Like usual there is always some catastrophe, drama, ceilings falling, kitchen sinks leaking, dryers breaking, the list goes on and on! I have come to realize as a mother raising two boys and with the "villiages" help (another post) to back me up this is where my sanity comes from.
Whether it's a Hersey bar from a friend or a helping hand when something breaks it's easier to face when you got both!
Happy Friday Everyone!! The work day is almost over, yippy!! It's been along week!
Rules: Copy and paste the following questions to your blog post, answer them, then c'mon back and link up! If you'd like, grab the code for the blog hop...but you don't have to!! I'd also loooovvvveeee it if you'd link back to me, Mama M., so people know where to go for the next go around!
If you don't have a blog, but want to join in the fun...feel free to post your answers in the comments of any of the blogs along the way!
It's a fun, easy post and it's all about YOU!
1. What's your guilty pleasure?
Wow, what a question to start out with huh....I could be here for awhile, this is a very tough question... they aren't listed in any specific order.
I would have to say Reading the Black Dagger Brotherhood Series by J.R. Ward, no wait, Venti White Chocolate Peppermint Mochas from Starbucks, no the Twilight Series Edward Cullen (ooops).
2. What is your favorite TV series?
Well...since our TV's aren't actually "hooked up" to anything other than DVD/VCR/PS3. We get Netflix and they have TV Seasons that we rent from them. My fav's are The Tudors on Showtime, True Blood on HBO, & Grey's Anatomy. I am also liking the new NCIS Los Angeles. I have caught a few episodes and I think it's a pretty good show, or is it the fact that Chris O'Donnell is in, idk....
3. Can you speak any foreign languages?
Nope, I cannot speak a foreign language. I know some random words in Spanish and that's about it. I took two years of it in High School and did very poorly.
4. How many pairs of shoes do you own?
Hey Everyone !
1. Do you do a real or fake Christmas tree?
I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving. The boys and I went to Felicia's for dinner. I was really nice to spend the holiday with friends from church. We had the best food ever and Bill made the most amazing candied yams! I totally forgot to bring my camera, the boys looked so cute with the dress shirts on.
I saw i
t and I liked it I did! BUT.... have some thoughts about it..... new director makes me wish they could have a "do over" for the 1st, this director was way better!! 2) There were too many "little jokes" like I get they are in the book and I laughed don't get me wrong it's just at times it seemed like over kill. 3) Ya know they did the whole cut it at the end, it felt like the Soprano's Fade to Black, I get that as well, to keep you guessing, blah blah blah and to see the next one. It's just terrible. 4) Grown women making noises at a boy, I mean seriously Taylor isn't legal and it was frightening to see. I can go on, did i like of course but am I a Twi~hard nah, just a fan of the books and I liked the movie just not a lunatic when it comes to it. Maybe a little, but just because I like the franchise doesn't mean I have to be in ♥ with EVERY aspect of it, right. I can go about some of the other things I am not crazy about. I did like it a lot but like in everything I must give my honest opinion.
So I have read a few blogs and this whole question thing seems kind of cool and thought I would give it a try this week!
1. Are you a Black Friday shopper? I have been 2 once at 4am I was so tired and can't even remember if the deals were worth it or not. I just think I purchased way too much that year!
The 2nd time I was in NYC not shopping, I was with my sister headed to Broadway to see a show.
2. What was your favorite childhood toy? (Think Easy Bake Oven, Cabbage Patch Kid, Shrinky Dinks, etc.) Barbies, I loved them! I was a totally nut when it came to them. I had to have a ton of cars, clothes, you name it!
3. Favorite Christmas movie? Wow, that is a tough one!! There are so many to choose from.... I guess I would have to say the Tim Allen Santa Clause Movies or the orgininal Miracle on 34th St.
4. What is the "must have" item on your Christmas list this year? Honestly, I don't ever think of myself at Christmas, as long as my children have gifts and are happy that is a gift in its self.
5. Do you go all out with decorations or do you keep it simple and classy? Keep it simple. My tree is where the decoration is key. White & Multi colored lights, ribbons, character ornaments, there is a theme I stick to. But as for the house it's simple.
I got a new car, Mr. X has taken the mini van and I had to get a vehicle. It's funny how things work out. I went to the dealership and tried to purchase a Nissan Xterra. I test drove it started the paper work and all then Mr. X asked what other cars they had and we went outside. As i walked back into the dealership they were playing a Christian Radio Station. I didn't notice it earlier and as I was standing there the song Tunnel from Third day came on. Why it's so awesome is because that is the song that is my ring tone on the phone for my church family. It's the song that they always quote, that there is a light in this darkness/my tunnel. So AWESOME! I just have to share how GOD is present in my life and how he is in your too! HE gives us signs that he is with us and we just have to open our eyes to them. I kept asking God for a Volvo and for the whole car situation to work out and it did. Yes he listens and helps us when we need him. Without God and his many Blessings it wouldn't be possible. It may not be a Volvo but it's a Volkswagen Passat!
For all that don't know I am holding a Bible Study in my home. Together we are reading Captivating by Stasi Eldredge.
Today I am working on the Study Guide for Lesson 6. We just got done reading Healing the Wound and I feel like we have come so far as a group. This book has made us laugh, cry, and occasionally throw it across the room. We are at the half way point and as I read the chapter I kept singing Bon Jovi's Living on Prayer. Reading this has taken me on the journey to the inner depths of me, which can be kind of scary at times. I am so grateful for the strong and wonderful women that have joined this group! I highly recommend this book to all women, read it, do the group study, you would be so glad you did.
This week is going to be great! I can't wait to meet again!
This has been a huge topic with my friends and I. They have given me such encouragement and wisdom. If it wasn't for them I wouldn't have my head on straight. Becky and Felicia have been telling me constantly to ask God for things that I need. I am struggling with this a lot! I struggle with the need vs want. I need a vehicle since the one I currently drive isn't mine. I want a Volvo..... See what I mean. The want vs need. Do I need one, well technically speaking I do need a car...do I need a Luxury SUV, well again tech yes since I am worth it's weight in gold. "I am a Princess and my father is the King of Kings", to quote Melissa. I have been asking for a lot lately I know, between the kids, my finances, this whole divorce thing, the heat , the house, the car situation. I mean I can go on, on, on, on.
Ok so this year I am turning 28 and I am currently in the process of making Birthday Plans! I want to have a party at the house this year. Becky and I were talking about combining our Birthday's so well see how it goes! It is going to be awesome!
The Theme Choices:
Black & Pink ~ If Becky and I combine the CELEBRATION!
Black & Red with a Twilight Twist ~ If we don't. 
I changed the name from when I first started this, I guess it just didn't work after all. I am looking forward to this working out this time!
I wanted a place where I could rant, rave, complain, whine, and write about the anything. I am on this road called Life and want to share things I have found along the way.
Well As you can see this isn't something I kept up! Which is par for the course in my life. I looked at the date of my last post, go figure it was the day before my Scott left me.
*** I deleted the post that was there, it was me talking about how happy I was. That our family was doing great and we had an awesome weekend. Then Monday came and he said he was leaving and I will leave it at that.
So this is my first entry....I have been thinking what on earth could I possibly write about, coming up with a name for this was hard enough. Gosh, it took me like forever to think of a name and really decide if I want to do this. So I figured what the heck why not try it and see where it goes. If it goes nowhere, I noticed a delete button under the settings.
I'm guessing your probably wondering where the title came from. I was flipping through a catalog and saw a coffee mug with that saying on it and thought how great is that. So while I was staring at my computer screen racking my brain for a name, I remember the abc catalog that came today and the funny mugs and magnets that had in there. I wanted something clever to name it.
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